12 September 2008

Another one bites the dust

JLo is off my celebrity list. I was never a big fan, but I can see the appeal. But when I thought she had gone/went public with using IVF to get pregnant with her twins, I figured I might be able to swing buying a CD of hers. You know, to help her pay for her IVF.

Anyhoo, it now seems that she is denying using IVF. In fact, her exact quote is,
“We knew nothing was wrong with either one of us—I had been checked, and he had kids already,” she says. “I knew, Something’s not ready here, in my head or in my life, and when it is, I know it’s going to happen.”
Wow. JLo told herself to "just relax."

So apparently, according to Jennifer Lopez, if you pursue IVF that means there's something "wrong" with you. Being 38 and never having had children doesn't mean there's something "wrong." Having a body that has gone too long without doing what nature intended and now doesn't seem to know how doesn't mean there's something "wrong."

I don't know which story is true, and I don't really care whether or not Lopez used IVF to get pregnant. But if she did use IVF, why hide it? Why is there still a stigma attached to using IVF? Having worked in The Industry (TM), I know for an absolute fact there are celebrities who have used IVF. But they keep it under the rug. Very very far under the rug. I think they're so wrong. It hasn't hurt Celine Dion to be public about using ART. If other celebrities came out about using IVF, maybe the rest of the world would be interested, and the result would be lots of Cosmo magazine stories about, "10 ways to talk to your best friend about her infertility."

I suppose the downside to that is if you tell your family that you're using a fertility clinic, you run the risk of your sister-in-law screeching, "Oh my god! I just read in People magazine that Paris Hilton is going to be an egg donor for her mother's IVF!"

I know it's a personal, private thing and wouldn't expect anyone to go on TV saying, "Hey, guess what? We're using ART to try to get pregnant!" But after the fact, if you are successful, and there are rumours swirling, why not talk about it? Why not talk about the pain, the suffering, the emotional rollercoaster? It's weird that if you're a celebrity, it's okay to talk about being raped, sexually abused, a coke addict, a heroin addict, an alcoholic.

But using IVF to get pregnant implies there`s something "wrong" with you, and we certainly can't have that.

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At 13/9/08 2:18 p.m., Blogger Bea said...

And if they're not denying IVF, they're claiming they only did it for the convenience factor. Have you caught up with that one yet?


At 28/9/08 1:20 a.m., Blogger Lut C. said...

Um, well, we did IVF because there something wrong with us. No babies came, despite our best efforts, that was seriously wrong.

I don't talk about our troubles to just anyone either.

But you're right, it does no good in lifting stigma on infertility if everyone keeps denying it, especially high profile people like her.

At 2/10/08 6:13 p.m., Blogger miriamp said...

5 days late for her period and she "felt a flutter?" Even with twins, that, young lady, was indigestion!

I do have to agree that her phrasing was a bit awkward, and I'm sorry you were hurt by it.

Although, having something "wrong" with a person's body is a possible reason for not having children, even if it isn't the only possibility, and I'm sure she never researched it to know better, if in fact, she didn't have IVF.

At 4/12/08 4:32 a.m., Blogger Parenthood For Me said...

Great post!
I am an adoptive mom who went through over three years of ART. I started a not for profit called Parenthood for Me.
Our mission is to provide financial and emotional support to those starting families through medical intervention and adoption. Please visit my website:
There is a blog on the site where you can take a poll and post comments. Please pass the link on.
Erica Schlaefer

At 5/1/09 11:24 a.m., Blogger Meg said...

Why hellooooo! Just wondered how you're doing..


At 13/1/09 11:34 p.m., Blogger projgen said...

I'm here, Meg, thanks for checking up on me ;) I've just been really busy and trying to put down the 15 or so blog posts roiling in my head. I can't figure out how to get any of them from my brain to my blog, so I just don't post anything. Smart, eh? :sigh:

I'll try to update soon (fingers crossed). Thanks!

At 22/7/09 3:28 p.m., Blogger Meg said...

S'up then?

At 8/3/10 8:47 a.m., Blogger Nancy said...

I can understand what you are saying. Double standards really do hurt. Specially when they are from stars.

This is Nancy from Israeli Uncensored News

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