06 June 2007

Grace Slick's got nothin' on me

One week in and man, oh Manischewitz, my boobies ITCH! It's driving me crazy. They also hurt like hell. I remember that from last time - that progesterone just messes with my system.

Speaking of which, anyone ever read the fine print on Prometrium? Y'know, where it says, "Do not (their bold, not mine) use Prometrium if you... are pregnant or suspect you may be pregnant."

Um, what?

Also (and this is not very modest of me, so if you're offended by that, you might want to look away now), my crotch is like a space heater on high. I'm emitting so much heat from that part of my body that I could sweat out a small room. Yeesh. Giving that I'm taking progesterone capsules suspended in peanut oil vaginally, I'm emitting other things, as well, but we don't need to go there. Let's just say panty liners are a girl's best friend. I still don't compare to Persephone's stories, though (I also use something like GladRags, not store-bough disposable thingies).

And I'm worn out. Pooped. Wiped. (huh. Never noticed the relationship between those two words before.) And having majorly bizarre dreams. I usually remember my dreams, and they're frequently quite detailed. But lately, they've been highly detailed, extremely clear and just plain weird. Last night I dreamt that I had a baby - not delivered, a newborn just appeared - and I was worried about nursing, but it just latched right on. Then I didn't feed it for 8 hours, but I didn't seem worried, because I took the baby, put it on the grass, where it turned into a white rabbit and started noshing away on the green stuff. And that's just the highlights.

For those of you who are wondering, the last time I smoked pot was the one time I tried it 25 years ago in high school. And no, I've never dropped acid, either. Who needs that stuff when I've got progesterone!! Woohoo! I should start selling it on the street; I could help pay for so many people's cycles! Although getting people to buy into the "take vaginally" part of it, might limit my market.

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6 Comments:

At 6/6/07 9:36 PM, Blogger Rachel Inbar said...

Yuck. Doesn't sound fun (though your description is hilarious). Back in my day, they stupidly made them (the fun little progesterone do-fliggies) in PINK, so that they leaked PINK all over the place...

I'm thinking of you!

 
At 6/6/07 11:54 PM, Blogger projgen said...

PINK??!! Ugh. So basically it looked like you were barfing Pepto Bismal in your undies? Thank you for making me thankful for dull yellow...

 
At 7/6/07 6:13 AM, Blogger Nearlydawn said...

You are too funny...

I would like to do the suppositories, but my RE doesn't agree. He makes all the ladies do shots. You think maybe he's into pain?

 
At 7/6/07 7:40 AM, Blogger Bea said...

Ah... yeah. Babies. Grazing. Pom-pom tails. Sure, why not?

My mind is boggling trying to work out exactly what the vaginal application would do to your market...

Bea

 
At 7/6/07 8:11 PM, Blogger projgen said...

well, for starters Bea, I'd lose the male market! ;)

Dawn, I'm grateful every day for those stupid suppositories. I couldn't do that needle. Not that big. I need a drink just *thinking* about it!

 
At 8/6/07 12:16 PM, Blogger Allformybaby said...

Yeah, I did the double take on the prog perscription too. I guess they have to cya on everything these days. For instance, I bought some "Fertility Blend" vitamins and the disclamer said not to take with fertility medication. That made me raise an eyebrow big time. HUH!! If it made the drug less effective then how was it going to work in the first place, and if it was going to enhance the drug why not?? Good luck with everything....sending sticky thoughts your way!!!
(((huggs)))
A

 

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